a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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