I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
