Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
