Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
