I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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