The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
