Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
