Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
