i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
