just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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