I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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