420 ftw
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
my god I love twenty year old dicks
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize
