so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Of course I have a pirate flag
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
