Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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