oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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