It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize