Please, let me fuck your mom
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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