Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
