Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
organizing the empties. That sober.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
