Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
