He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
