with your own penis?
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
