Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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