Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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