do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I cockslap morals
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
