There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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