are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
