Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Randomize
