it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
