thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
