I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
