i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize
