Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
