new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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