do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
