I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
