Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Randomize
