with your own penis?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
