i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
