dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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