I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
