Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
The air was thick with penises
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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