i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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