So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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