I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
