Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
