the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
