Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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