no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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