i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
